May 23 2013

Hey!

   So I think I am going to keep this post short and sweet. To be honest this post might be kind of hard for me to write since I have been having a lot of issues lately. It seems as though my anxiety and depression issues have been getting worse or at the very least not any better. I have made some recent changes though to my medication and while it is still to early to tell if this dosage will work I am hoping it will. I am still hoping that I will one day be off the medication (since I HATE medication) and I truly hope that day is soon but for right now I think I need them.

   Since I have been having a rough time I haven't really left my room/house in a bit. In away this is a blessing because it has given me plenty of time to think about what I am grateful for. For starters I have caught up on my sleep since that is all I seem to be able to do the last few days (even though my medication makes me feel as though I haven't at times since I am still getting use to it and tiredness is a side effect). I have also had plenty of time to do homework. My goal for the summer is to have all 3 of my summer courses done by the end of June minus the exams so that I can enjoy some of my summer. I have also had a chance to re-organize my bedroom which was a nice distraction.

I think one of the things I am most grateful for though is being on Facebook more....now hear me out!!! If I hadn't been on my computer a little (ok a lot more) than usual the last few days/weeks I may have missed this wonderful video clip. If you are on Facebook I am sure you have seen it or at least heard about it. But if you haven't I'll post a link here. (Spoiler Alert: Watch the clip before reading on!) http://www.upworthy.com/this-kid-just-died-what-he-left-behind-is-wondtacular-rip

While Zach's story is incredibly sad it shows that no matter how bleak things look don't give up. It also tells us that we shouldn't take our life for granted because it can be taken away from us in a split second. We should take each day that we are given and use every second of it to the best of our abilities. I am truly grateful for stumbling on this clip and I am going to try and remember this lesson from Zach and emulate it in my own life.

Anyways, sorry for the kind of blah post guys I hopefully will have some more interesting ones in the near future!

What are you grateful for???  

May 16th.... so much for this everyday thing eh!

Hey guys!

Sorry I haven't written on here for awhile! Things were quite busy there for awhile with exams, moving out and just other things. I never realized how hard it was going to be to write something every day. I don't mean that it is hard to write something to be thankful about because that is the easy part. I just mean finding the time! After I had missed a few days I started to make a list of all the things I was thankful for on daily basis in hopes of catching up in a future blog but after awhile I realized that, that blog entry was going to end up being way to long and that nobody was probably going to read it so I scrapped it. However, I will add a few of the items that I am thankful for onto the end of this post. :)

Firstly, I am thankful for finishing my semester and doing relatively well in my courses even though I dropped one. I know that seems like kind of a weak thing to be thankful for but trust me, i'm thankful! This semester/year wasn't one of my most stellar semesters with just a lot of other things interfering with my concentration on school. To say I am glad it is done is an understatement.

Secondly, I am thankful for those people who were understanding and were always there for me to lean on when I felt like I was going crazy or having a meltdown. For those that know me know that I can tend to be a "perfectionist" and "people pleaser."I don't like to have people disappointed in me (who does?!) so I was worried that because of my past choices and where I was now that I was letting everyone down. I was thankful to find out though that, that wasn't the case at all. Even though I still carry a lot of guilt from my past I know that others don't see it that way and that maybe things aren't as bad as they seem at times.

Thirdly, I am thankful that someone in my family is going to be fine. A few days ago someone in my family had a health scare that I think had all of us on edge. However, it ended up not being a huge deal and she is suppose to be back to her old self in no time! I am so thankful that my dad was there to help and that everyone dropped everything to help her. I am also thankful that she has a place to go to after her stay at the hospital.

Finally, I am thankful for LU and for everyone there! This year even though had it's up and downs was still pretty great! I met some new friends to go out for coffee with, send funny youtube clips to and who I can go to concerts with! Even though I am THRILLED it's summer I am excited for the future there and for all the other adventures I will have in the years to come.

                                                   My view from my apartment at LU

What are you thankful for???

Wednesday March 20th

Good Mornin'!!

So... considering it is 5:30 am and I haven't gone to bed yet there isn't going to be some creatively ironic title to this post (not that there really was before!) Just the simple date which happens to not actually be the date of when I am writing this post since it is so late/early morning! Who knows I may start just putting the date as the title to keep everything all "chronologically in order" even though I think that happens automatically on here...

Anyways, today was actually a really awesome day! It wasn't that I did anything super exciting like go see the Big Nickel (some Sudbury humour for y'all) or go skating but it was just that I got a lot of little things done. Things that I had been putting off for ages. For those of you who know me personally know I am a professional procrastinator so actually finishing something early is like a HUGE dealio for me! It's not that I don't want to do things early it is just that I have to make sure the laundry is done, my desk is clean, the floor is swept, i've texted those people, seen that new youtube video of adults acting out conversations that kids have (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q0QBTqsPmLQ) and finally checked my Facebook and email for the 100th time. If you still need proof that I am a professional procrastinator just ask my mama, she will confirm it! ;)

I also, got to see a friend today (through pictures since I couldn't be there in person) conquer the fear of mind over matter. She participated in a fire walk in honour of her mother in law who passed away from a brain tumour. For those of you who don't know what a fire walk is it is when a person walks over burning coals BARE FOOT. I'm not sure how it works and how you don't burn your foot off but apparently you end up being ok after with all 10 toes still intact! Regardless, I can't imagine how nerve racking that must be for someone so I am extremely proud of her for going through with it! I know I would have gone running the other way and I can't even feel hot and cold on my feet! The fact that she raised money for a wonderful charity and then did this crazy but amazing thing says a lot about the person she is! Kudos girly!!!

What are you thankful for??? 

  

Whoa! Thank you so much!

 Hey guys!!

First, off I want to thank you all for your kind and encouraging words! I think I was able to respond to everyone who messaged me but if I missed anyone please know that I am so thankful for your encouraging words! Also, I apologize for the earlier issues with the comments section...that was completely user error on my part! I am completely new (not to mention technologically challenged!) to all of this and haven't a clue as to what I am doing... if that wasn't already apparent! It is fixed now though so please comment away about anything or tell me what you are thankful for in your own life below!

When I first mentioned that I was doing this blog I wasn't sure if anyone would read it or if people would think it's lame but I just looked at the "stats" link on blogger and 325 people have read my first blog! That's insane, look out Oprah! I am so thankful you all have embraced this and I hope this has encouraged you to maybe re-avaluate your own lives and to look at what you really appreciate in life!

So today I am again thankful for all of you reading this. I am also thankful for those friends who have dealt with my craziness the past couple of months. I know there have been a few times where I have texted some of you in need of a Starbucks break and you have been so kind to drop everything and hangout or just come over when I am having "one of those days"! I am also thankful for finishing my last paper EVER in one of my classes today. Even though I still have more assignments to write for other classes it is a good feeling knowing that I can cross another "to do" thing off of the list!

What are you thankful for???

Beauty in Everything

Hey Y'all! 

So if you have stumbled onto this page it was probably because of my other blog "Sweet Insomnia". I created that blog a few years back one night while you guessed it... I had insomnia! However, that is all I did, I created it. I had a blast choosing the background and I swore I would write in it daily. It would be my little piece of the Internet just for me. That obviously didn't happen though! I do want to start writing in it but I thought I could create sort of a mini blog to go along side it to just get me back into the "writers groove" again sort of speak! I have always loved words and have always been fascinated with the use of them and how they can mean so much and have so much power BUT I think as I grew up I began to also resent them. 

After writing paper after paper of non creative "gibberish" to be marked and graded by a professor I began to write less and less. Writing which at one point had been my outlet for so many years seemed to now be a chore and something I had to do just for a mark on a paper. I began to be that person who would increase the punctuation in a sentence to a size 13 or 14 font in hopes that the line would get carried down to the next line and i wouldn't have to write as much. No seriously, I did that once thanks to a helpful tip from my roomie when I complained to her that I still had a quarter of a page to write and nothing to say in a paper. *Take note university students!* I think I saw writing as rules and styles versus the creativity that it could be. That being said this blog is going to be raw and if I am being completely honest pretty unedited. I will probably  have comma splices and incorrect punctuation so grammar Nazis beware! Who knows I may have posts that are all one sentence or very few sentences! Just like some other famous authors (Ernest Hemingway, anyone?!) But let's be serious that's really annoying and kind of hard to read so probably not! My point is that this is just going to be a fun little blog where I can write what I want and you guys the readers (if I have any) can respond with whatever you want...no judgements what so ever!

Now... on to the point of this blog shall we? Recently, I have been going through a rough time with depression and anxiety.**spoiler alert for those friends I hadn't told** I have good days and bad days like everyone does but I seem to have forgotten the little important things in life. To be thankful for the fact that I live in a country as great as Canada where I am blessed to have freedom of speech. That I have AMAZING friends and family who love me for me even though I'm full of crazy and probably drive them up the wall at times! That i make more than two dollars a day at a job which automatically makes me richer than 92% of the world.(http://globalrichlist.com/) Or that as a girl with a "physical disability" (I hate saying that FYI) I have the opportunity to even attend school (post secondary at that!). While some girls in other parts of the world are not allowed to regardless of being "disabled" or not. 

All this being said each day I am going to write a little bit about my day and what I am thankful for. When I was in the hospital last year there was a lady there who wrote a page a day in her diary. She had been doing this for about 40 years (that's a lot of notebooks yo!). I thought the idea of having your whole life essentially on paper was pretty cool and I would start doing that...tomorrow. Well ladies and gentlemen, tomorrow is today (well in this case today is yesterday considering it is 6:35 am on Tuesday and I am writing as if it is Monday evening...sorry I had a non-creative-for-marks-paper to write first!) 

As you guys read this blog I encourage you guys to do the same. No you don't have to create a blog and write in fancy lettering and what not...although it can be fun! I would encourage you to think about what you are thankful for because no matter what your situation is right now there is always someone who is worse off than you and if you just open your eyes you will find beauty in the most unpredictable places! 

So I will start off.... I am thankful for you- my friends, family and strangers who just happened to find this blog. Each and everyone one of you has a purpose in this world and without you the world wouldn't be the same!

So I ask...what are you thankful for???


“The most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched, they must be felt with the heart”- Helen Keller